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So there is a striking parallel -a logical, structural parallel- between 3-74 + 11-17-80, but in another, more profound respect the two are mirror opposites - since the first is a vision of world (which I thought was God, yet it was not, + so it yielded no knowledge directly about God, but only inferential knowledge that he existed + that he had saved me - in pronoia) + the second is a genuine theophany. When one realizes that world + God are wholly other to each other (Satan rules world) then this mirror opposite situation can be appreciated. Let me add, too, that total revelation about world does not yield knowledge of God. God entered when I became aware that my theorizing was carrying me into an infinite regress, which is to say, when I became exhausted - at which point enantiodromia occurred; intellect had proven futile + yet, paradoxically, it had led to God - but due to God's volitional initiative. His (as I call it) taking the field, which is an inbreaking by the divine.
The circumstances under which the theophany occurred (I gave up on the exegesis + kicked back + massively turned on) are not capricious causes but follow the logic of the dialectic along several axes. This shows the hauntingly eerie paradoxical (almost seemingly whimsical or playful) nature of enlightenment: it comes to you only when you cease to pursue it, when you totally + finally give up.


Notes

This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.
This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.
This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.
This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.
This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.
This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.
This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.
This is referring to the highest attainment in zen satori which is called no attainment. An exhaustion of psychic effort and devotion leads to full surrender of false ego to ' higher self' is Brahman or Sophia , depending upon which mystery school jargon is representing original source from which all knowable concepts proceed from and terminate into. Another approach in advaita (not two) is neti neti meaning not this or not that , the negation of any final concept or model that leaves one open to the actual experience beyond the finger which points to the moon. In other words to shoot the moon or achieve what seems impossible to discursive 'rational' mind. Mu.