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said to exist in eternity because that is how such vast space-time would seem to us. Also (+ this must not be forgotten) one archetypal situation (drama) is timelessly performed (or, to use our Realm #4 term, reperformed). The xerox missive must have been -or at least seemed to me to be at the time- part of the (or a) illo tempore reperformance. The letter in "The Hymn of the Pearl"? Olive Holt = my [ideological/identity] parent[s]. Hence I came to my true self Thomas, because my relationship to my parents is one of repudiation + rebellion: antagonism. + specifically disobedience; refusal to do what I'm told to do (I was told to answer the xerox missive). (More precisely: Mother - Bad. Father - Good. Olive Holt = Mother.) (This dichotomy shows up in my two source cosmogony in "Valis".) So I ceased to be schizophrenic in 2-74, as I pondered in the Platt interview. But here by "schizophrenia" I mean a ubiquitous impairment, "the sinking of the soul". No wonder my breakthrough recently that led to these conclusions had to do with perception of a metastructure of which we normally see only the discrete components! (Since it all has to do with abstracting.) The occlusion that I first detected in 1971 is real + it is ubiquitous.

[illustration presented below in text form

small limited..vast space +.....abstract -.....The One: space + time...time: eternity...no space-time..the void- so Realm 4........Realm 3..........Realm 2........something ...............................................like space ..............................................Realm 1


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[illustration presented below in text form]

A) USA 1974 / accidents I---- Acts AD 45 essence Wrong, leads to the peculiar idea that it is really AD 45 Rome. But the correct view: B) USA 1974 / accidents AD 45 / accidents I I essence leads to Plato's universals + anamnesis by which, as he says, the universals are "recovered". This is the true case; I performed a sort of meta-abstracting in 2-74 when I realized this diagram; this is what I realized, not (A), as I have thought for 6 1/2 years. But the "He causes things to ..." statement indicated that realm #3 is real (morphological arrangement) + the spatiotemporal with its mere accidents is not. Two space-time continua based on the same universal are that universal when superimposed. Simple reincarnation would not explain why I saw Acts as being here. - "The space-time continua with the same Essence are not just tangent: they coincide [in terms of morphological arrangement]." + this is the arrangement (not spatiotemporal) that Nous (Valis) employs. You are seeing the world-order the way Nous sees it. This opens up a vast meta-life to you; you have lived at many times + places but it is all one life + one way of being in the world. No wonder when the xerox missive came I felt as if it had all happened before - but this time it came out differently. You are not doomed to repeat mechanically the same motions + fall victim to the same Nemesis once again; through anamnesis what you have learned accrues + this is of supreme importance; this this accrual Fate is broken: other subselves or perhaps your


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10-19-80 4

The knowledge about the Xerox missive devolves directly out of the supratemporal template of the Black Iron Prison against which I am timelessly pitted. It is knowledge derived -- derived from that realm, due to the existence of that essence realm and my access to it. Thomas knew then, knows now and will know later who sent the Xerox missive; he told me the source, recently. Words such as past, present and future have no meaning for the BIP template and Thomas. This is why the Xerox missive threat-puzzle shows up in "Faith Of" and PENULTIMATE TRUTH. It is not from a future self; it is from the essence realm and probably myself as Thomas in the essence realm. So I was not doomed to the limitations of the spatiotemporal realm at the time of that threat-puzzle. I saw it under the aspect of eternity and so knew what it was. That is why I knew it was coming -- in fact the exact day it would come. I feel certain, absolutely certain, that my anamnesis the month before had this specific problem-solving as its goal; my meta-abstracting was goal-oriented ... it was planned; it wasn't an accident. Also it had to do with the meta-morpheme in TEARS, which is a constituent of the information basis of the morphologically-arranged realm.


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10-20-80 9

Now consider STIGMATA -- which was based on my actually seeing that visage in the sky as the cosmic lord of this world. The master magician, identified with YHWH, whose world isn't real at all; shades of Gnosticism! Is this the real basis of Gnostic acosmism, the presence of the Palmer Eldritch magician-figure and his irreal world that replaces the real one? The master magician of STIGMATA and his irreal hallucinogenic worlds; the messages in UBIK getting through to you from the real world; the polyencephalic fusion of MAZE; the mockup at a different time in JOINT; the private worlds of EYE; the Acts material in TEARS, and the forced labor camps -- and you add the stories such as "Faith of ... " The .618034 doorway. Was that to the real world? It seemed to show ancient Greece on the far side; i.e. the actual present. The Greco-Roman Mediterranian world. My last glimpse as it moved away; no: as I fell back into this subrealm of hyperflux. So this is Satan's world (as in VALIS) and Christ/Valis/YHWH invades it. This is why realm #3 is exploded through thousands of years of our time. Realm #3 is the real world. So a message there that is intact is exploded here through thousands of our dilated time years. Like the meta-morpheme in TEARS -- one morpheme in a message. I see. A message is transmitted from the real world (realm #3) to our world. In realm #3 the real world it takes a minute. Here, it spans 2000 years. Look at the communications problem. Whole civilizations rise and fall while they --in realm #3-- transmit one message to us. The message is exploded over the span of two thousand of our years so although they're aware of us, how can they communicate with us? This is dealt with in Varley's story. But incorrectly! They'd have to speed up a message so that the total message was transmitted in a billionth of a second by their real elapsed time. Maybe that's how the AI voice works. All its messages to me were transmitted in a single billionth of a second and arrive spread out over years. Now I'm getting fanciful. But still -- They would try to ride and cook our communications media in an effort to communicate with us, reach us. And of course they'd be communicating in Greek, Latin, Hebrew. Hebrew! Maybe we're real small; space there is enormous compared to ours. They would put a probe of some kind through. Valis. Perturb our reality field.


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10-21-80 9

This doesn't fit Christianity at all, even Gnosticism. Then VALIS alludes to a vast mystery understood by the Orphics, Plato, Plotinus and Pythagoras; but no one knows about it now. Jane Harrison's book makes clear that Orphism was a conscious effort to get you up out of realm #4 and back to a unitary soul as eidos in realm #3, and this carries over into Platonism ... but what a dreadful secret lies here, one I am just beginning to glimpse. And what dimensions salvation has! For you to be unified again ... could Jesus have known about this? There is no indication of it. I see; the One became Nous; unity was lost; with each lower realm came more multiplicity, and here we are, splintered into a thousand fragments in this spatiotemporal, atomized realm; not just the realm atomized but each of our souls. What a fate. Gnosis or a savior is needed, or both; this is a dreadful condition; the Judo-Christian theme of the Fall underestimates its dreadfulness. Not just the Godhead fell into plurality (sparks) but each individual soul did, too. So Thomas was another portion of me, of my soul, rejoining the part that PKD is; two parts --did this comprise a whole, a totality? Or are there other parts still missing? And the AI voice; is that my unitary intact soul in realm #3? I think so. The Gnostics are right; our primordial mistake was to take the spatiotemporal world as real. That's it. The Fall lay there. It was an intellectual error and I reversed it in 2-3-74; this is what 2-3-74 consisted of; I no longer took it as real. Hence my ten volume meta novel is on the right path.


As of late last night my emotions (affective self) moved into synch with my intellect (as engaged in this exegesis), and the result was that I surveyed a world-picture of such bleakness that it was for a time beyond my capacity to bear. I saw and understood suffering, not just intellectually, not just emotionally, but fully, with complete comprehension. Today I have thought about it, and the only attitude that can or should be brought to bear is a stoic one, in fact a heroic one, a facing of this bleakness unflinchingly, with no attempt to flee from it as a vision or existentionally, as a way of being in the world. It is a view of the weary wheel of Buddhism; it is the Buddha's view of absolute suffering and the need not to be reborn, to get off the


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