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the future had broken in moving retrograde in time. This "future breaking in" is: real time! Due to the destroying of the supremecy of the past (prior thought-formations as world). Once these prior thought-formations' power over you (heimarmene or fate or world rule or astral determinism) you can see (?) (experience) the Tao: the reality as it is without the prior thought-formations. You can see the tug by the Tao (matrix containing the eide) on reality-as-a-field. So this in no way is solipsism. The prior thought-formations that you project + that come back to you as world come betwen - stand between - you + the Tao (+ the eide or, as I call it, macrometasomakosmos). So I have been right all these years: a god deal of your reality is projected from/by your own mind, but it is projected onto eternal eide, a living structure or kosmos contained in the Tao but not the Tao; the structure of eide are in the Tao but aren't the Tao.

[Illustration presented below in text format]

Percipient --- prior thought..... eide or ... Tao Participant -- formations ------- metasoma ----- ___________________________________________________ .............. Irreal aspects ... complexity ... simplicity .............. spatiotemporal ... real ......... real

These prior thought formations are based on a vast personal history that has been forgotten; one's memory is occluded. Now I am ready to drop the big

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___ I cannot completely discard the notion that the irreal or semireal spatiotemporal realm (continuum) is to some extent based on the percipient's own prior thought-contents (vide "Frozen Journey") + hence in dead time. + that anamnesis is a recognizing world as your own prior thought-content coming back at you - whereupon you heroically rouse yourself to wakefulness + act heroically (with the emphasis on act) to introduce something new: a single new element. This breaks the recirculated programming (fate, heimarmene, astral determinism) forever, + starts up real time, even though you then sink back into sleep, + Maya returns (both Maya + Karma are involved here). The point is: during this brief interval of wakefulness - set off by anamnesis - you are in the real world - which is what I saw in 3-74: + it is quite different from the delusional world made-up of your endlessly recirculated prior thought contents; hence in 3-74 I saw "the second signal", the plasmate, set-ground, + Valis. So your heroic act although it deals with the prior thought-contents is an act in the real world - what I

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very archaic thought-contents (mine) coming back to me as world- reveals that the actual reality is not spatiotemporal but some kind of matrix onto which a number of (anyhow more than one) spatiotemporal set of accidents can be syntonically projected. Surely I saw this living, sentient matrix when I saw Valis. Thus USA 1974 is disclosed as being only another set of spatiotemporal aspects -projected onto the matrix- taken by me the percipient as world, but being in fact my own prior ossified thought-contents - which leads me back to the realization of the crucial -in fact all important- need to commit an act, an heroic deed during this moment of wakefulness, of freeing oneself from the spell of Maya, which will introduce newness + thus (this is the whole point) breaking the power of Karma (astral determinism, heimarmene, fate), since the prior thought-contents cannot now be reinstated to recirculate forever because they no longer apply (the slight deviation in the past -in time travel stories- that sets up a whole new future). In fact as time goes on they apply progressively less + less. So you don't really succumb to irreality ever again, if you commit this heroic act.

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real in the arrangement of that which in itself is substantial but only semireal, enables me to fathom the mystery of Valis, of what I saw in 3-74 that I used to call "pretextual cause" + "valence away from plumb", but later "tug" based on the AI voice speaking of it as "a perturbation [in the reality field]"; the divine is not the reality field (objects + their normal processes) but the perturbation or arrangement finally deserving the term structure. This set-ground reversal on my part is of critical importance in my apperception of the divine. Now, looking back to what I saw in 3-74 that I called Valis, + envisioning the arrangement that a magnetic field causes in iron filings sprinkled on a piece of paper - well, that letter in "Psychology Today" shows I am on the right track. This is an extraordinary + highly sophisticated view on how (if at all) the divine can be apprehended in terms of reality; it is not apprehended as reality ("the reality field") but by the "perturbation" it causes in that reality [field], a perturbation that is not in itself divinity but rather is the discernible tracing of the force that in itself - unknowable to us - is divinity. We cannot know

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XV 11-17-80 1

God manifested himself to me as the infinite void; but it was not the abyss; it was the vault of heaven, with blue sky and wisps of white clouds. He was not some foreign God but the God of my fathers. He was loving and kind and he had personality. He said, "You suffer a little now in life; it is little compared with the great joys, the bliss that awaits you. Do you think I in my theodicy would allow you to suffer greatly in proportion to your reward?" He made me aware then, of the bliss that would come; it was infinite and sweet. He said, "I am the infinite. I will show you. Where I am, infinity is; where infinity is, there I am. Construct lines of reasoning by which to understand your experience in 1974. I will enter the field against their shifting nature. You think they are logical but they are not; they are infinitely creative." I thought a thought and then an infinite regression of theses and countertheses came into being. God said, "Here I am; here is infinity." I thought another explanation; again an infinite series of thoughts split off in dialectical antithetical interaction. God said, "Here is infinity; here I am." I thought, then, an infinite number of explanations, in succession, that explained 2-3-74; each single one of them yielded up an infinite progression of flipflops, of thesis and antithesis, forever. Each time, God said, "Here is infinity. Here, then, I am." I tried for an infinite number of times; each time an infinite regress was set off and each time God said, "Infinity. Hence I am here." Then he said, "Every thought leads to infinity, does it not? Find one that doesn't." I tried forever. All led to an infinitude of regress, of the dialectic, of thesis, antithesis and new synthesis. Each time, God said, "Here is infinity; here am I. Try again." I tried forever. Always it ended with God saying, "Infinity and myself; I am here." I saw, then, a Hebrew letter with many shafts, and all the shafts led to a common outlet; that outlet or conclusion was infinity. God said, "That is myself. I am infinity. Where infinity is, there am I; where I am, there is infinity. All roads --all explanations for 2-3-74-- lead to an infinity of Yes-No, This or That, On-Off, One-Zero, Yin-Yang, the dialectic, infinity upon infinity; an infinities of infinities. I am everywhere and all roads lead to me; omniae wiae ad Deum ducent. Try again. Think of another possible explanation for 2-3-74." I did; it led to an infinity of regress, of thesis and antithesis and new synthesis. "This is not logic," God said. "Do not think in terms of absolute theories; think

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